One fewer musketeer

In loving memory of my friend

I wrote a post in late July about a friend who was dying of cancer. Last night, his mother texted to say that he had passed away late Wednesday night.

I’m heartbroken and am proud to have been his friend. So now I thought I would tell you a little more about my friend Chad.

Chad and I were buddies in high school, along with Matt (whom I actually met at the finger painting table in preschool). We were the Three Musketeers of geekdom, although it wasn’t nearly as cool to be a part of that in the early 90s. Star Trek, Star Wars, outer space stuff, that was us. (I was the lone theater geek in the group, but that came with its own warm, welcoming community.)

Us in high school, but with heavier backpacks. Photo by British Library on Unsplash.

We also had a tendency to carry every single heavy textbook in our bag on our backs at all times, rather than doing the smart thing, which would’ve been to store them in our lockers until needed. That didn’t help our social standing any.

While Matt and I could blend in with the “normal” crowd when needed, Chad didn’t have that skill set. He wore his unquenchable thirst for knowledge on his sleeve, and never tried to hide it under a rock. He was also brilliant, always acing every exam, always challenging the teacher to dig deeper into an explanation, when the rest of us were excited to go to lunch.

I confess, I don’t know as much about Chad‘s life after high school—our lives went in different directions. But I do know that he always yearned for the connection that us musketeers had, often saying how he missed our lunchtime conversations, where we would dive down whatever geeky rabbit hole one of us cared to open. Whereas I found a wide world of fellow theater and arts geeks in college and beyond, Chad always seemed to struggle to find his tribe.

He did eventually marry, have a son, and lived abroad until illness brought him back stateside. I wish I knew more about that period of his life, how he settled into marriage and fatherhood. I hope his wife and son have all the love and support they could ever want right now.

Even though I never got to see him during these final weeks

, as I had hoped, I am grateful for the phone call we had this past April, and the occasional emails we exchanged since then. I’m grateful that he was my friend and sad that I now have one fewer. One fewer musketeer.

Rest easy, friend. There are bound to be many geeks wherever and whenever you are now, just waiting to engage in spirited debate and discussion on any nerdy subject.