Dialing the past 

(Or, when a best friend’s childhood landline still works after 35 years.)

My friend is dying.

At least, I think so.

I invited him to the launch party for my book last October. And his response as to why he unfortunately needed to decline was that he had stage four terminal cancer.

That probably means dying, right?

He, understandably, doesn’t really want to talk about it. We email sporadically, and were lucky enough to have a phone call while the family and I were at Disney World earlier this year. He wanted to hear about my life, my wife, my daughter, the book, and said little about the specifics of his diagnosis or his prospects. Only that things were extremely difficult, both his physical health and the emotional toll that it was taking on him and his parents.

And, quite frankly, I didn’t feel the need to probe further. Once you know that the light at the end of the tunnel is in fact an oncoming train – and you are tied to the tracks – the train’s make and model and color don’t matter much.

A lake in northern New Hampshire, where we are today. Just the sort of place where my friend would much rather be right now.

So I’ve been content with an occasional email and perhaps that one phone call. But I very much want to see him, even if it’s one last time. And of course, upon hearing this, my wife wisely said, “so go see him.“

And so, in my attempts to go see him, I realized I still remembered the phone number for his parents house, where I visited so often in their little corner of Southern Maine. Five minutes ago, just before writing these words, I dialed it. After what seemed like about 150 rings, an answering machine picked up with his father‘s voice. Was it a recent recording, or the same one that would greet me when I called over 35 years ago, hoping to talk to my friend about Star Trek, the Muppets, or the latest science nerd rabbit hole in which he found himself immersed?

Did I just call the past? Does my iPhone have the capability of sending me back to the early 1990s, before 9/11, before Covid, before our country began its descent into authoritarian madness?

Before my friend was dying?

Let’s see if the past calls back. And let’s hope I’m available to answer.